SLACTAVIS Syrup from Silly Bees & Da DoGooders!
Slactavis is a natural, hemp-based syrup derived from cannabis. It is the newest product from Silly Bees & Da DoGooders, a Colorado based company, and the top shelf of our lineup. Slactavis is a great tasting, all natural cannabis syrup that is a great alternative to smoking. While there is a lot of smoke and unwanted toxins in traditional cannabis products, Slactavis contains only pure, unadulterated cannabis extract, and is free of pesticides, solvents, and other harmful chemicals.
The favorite cannabis syrup, Dr. Brokeleg’s infamous SLACTAVIS, will be the subject of your gentleman’s discussion today. If you go to the marijuana parties around here, you’ll find SLAC from our good friends at Silly Bees, who you’ve probably heard of because I’ve mentioned them once or twice. Maybe you’ve heard of LEAN, a combination of cough syrup with codeine and Sprite? It’s canna-LEAN, not bad, super addictive opiates. If you’ve been following me for a while, you know that I have a majestic tolerance for food, kind of like a purple unicorn with a shiny golden horn. That said, in my previous experiences with SLAC, I had 1500mg of RSO hashish in a bottle, and it only caused a slight drowsiness. For this review, I took off my gloves, threw caution to the wind and went to work as I do for all other edible reviews – in the morning on an empty stomach. I also didn’t add soda because I have a theory that soda weakens the effect of the food, but maybe it’s just the pH of my body and I’m not a scientist anyway, maybe it has to do with moonshine and gluten, I don’t know. So, it’s true, I drank every last drop of that Sizzurp Strizzaight. That’s how I lost my Sunday. It pissed me off too. My goodness, I think my irritability is caused by lack of sleep, because I feel fine. Fully aligned. I just learned about a genre that has become my new hobby, it’s called chillwave. Washed Out is a typical artist from this electronica subgenre, and they just released a new album that I haven’t listened to yet because the old albums are so good. As I get older and grow up, I find that music and lyrics aren’t as important to me as they used to be. You’re heartbroken, no, you’re in love, you feel bad, you feel good, I get it. The human experience is. Above him. I love music more and more because it allows me to imagine myself on a quiet beach, in the moonlight, with my eyes closed, listening to the sound of the waves. Ideal for closing the SLAC. Buh dum ching. At GTHQ, experimenting with edibles is a serious business. I slept well, got up, waited an hour or so until I got hungry, then drank Dr. Brokeleg’s cocktail in three big gulps. The flavor is great, but the syrup is thick and sweet and really needs to be blended. I wait twenty minutes, then eat a CLIF bar with water. If my stomach remains completely empty, the edible effect is diluted – I need something, but not much food, to follow. I’m comfortable enough to watch a few old episodes of South Park that I missed and fall asleep for twenty minutes. All I have to do is close my eyes for a minute, SLACTAVIS lies, and then I pass out for two hours. Two hours later, I laboriously got out of bed, the sunlight making me open my eyes. The heavy, intoxicating indica buzz of SLACTAVIS protested, but I managed to stay vertical. After an hour, the noise subsided. I cleaned up and decided I needed to eat something real. I ate. I walked around a bit and then sat down to watch my favorite fourth graders uncensored again, but I only lasted until two episodes. At 7 I put the sheets back on and slept another 8 1/2 hours. Finally, I woke up at 3:30 and felt very rested. I was already hours behind everyone else in watching the new episode of Game of Thrones, but Samwell’s poopy montage in the opening sequence still dampened my enthusiasm. This week the eunuch sex makes up for this horror somewhat, but they combined the surgery with the food and took away my appetite. I just want to see the dragons throw ZOM-B-Q, no need to keep showing us how disgusting life was in the fictional feudal era. Some of us will survive after our country is destroyed by Chinese satellites emitting rage-inducing sounds, you know. After a few hours, I laid down for a nap for the last two hours before work. And I stayed awake all day today, so I think I’m done with SLAC. In total, 1500mg meant about twelve and a half hours of much needed sleep. I will definitely be scheduling more sleep days with Dr. Brokeleg’s SLACTAVIS syrup in the near future, I really need to catch up. While I highly recommend the effectiveness of the product, I wouldn’t recommend starting it like crazy if you haven’t used it today. And I can’t wait to try the new live resin mix! You think you can handle SLACTAVIS? At your own risk, Rip. Don’t blame me because you slept for a hundred years and the world is now too bright and scary and uses a language your primitive mind can’t understand, I’m either dead or a reanimated head floating in a jar. Anyway, it won’t be my problem.